What The Jorge?

Sorry for the lack of review for the girls night of AI. I herd it sucked balls, so maybe I just saved myself from cutting my fingers off and and stuffing them down my ears. But I shall cheer up because it’s my favorite time of the week, time to weed out some of the awfulness that is American Idol.

At this point as long as David Archuleta is still in it, I don’t care about anyone else.

Did I mention how much I love group performances? I feel like I’m watching a reality TV version of “The Backyardigans”

Did anyone else think that look on Danny’s face was priceless when he thought he was going home? He looked like he was in the semifinals of Miss America.

Jason Yeager was the first guy to go home. I still feel bad for him after the lashing Simon gave him, but he honestly could have been better (and stopped the cheesy smiling.) I am granted a little disappointed he’s gone now because he was one of my eye candies.

Alexandria Lushington was the first of the girls to go home. I was hoping Mrs. Munster was going to be the victim. After seeing a recap of Alexandria’s performance last night which I inadvertently missed I feel it was probably well-deserved. I felt bad for David Archuleta crying in the background though. I just wanted to squeeze his cute little self. If it was anyone else crying I would have been like “Listen here stoop! That’s one less competition for you. Quit crying! Suck it up!”

Then it was down to Kady Malloy and Alaina Whitaker, Alaina got picked to go home and Ramiele and Danny cried…AGAIN, someone needs to surgically remove their tear ducts or I am going to loose mine laughing at them. I didn’t remember Alaina much out of the competition, but of course Paula always tells everyone “This is just a start of a great career for you” which is a crock of horse poop.

Then it was down to Robbie Carrico and Luke Menard, thank God we finally sent “Robbie the Faker” home. I’m a little disappointed now because I will never know if he really was wearing a wig. But now he can go shave off that rock faced and be my new Justin Timberlake fantasy. More crying commenced. If these people are going to miss each other that much, maybe they should all just sleep with each other.

Well, I will have to admit, I will miss picking on Robbie, so I will have to find a new target for next week. Back to the refugee boat for much long needed pondering.

It was 70’s Night on AI.

Michael Johns started off the night talking about tennis. Oooook! But he did put a great spin on “You Can Go Your Own Way” by Fleetwood Mac. His voice in this performance kind of reminded me of a Jason Wade from Lifehouse. That vein in his neck was a little distracting when he was singing, but I did like it a lot, the performance that is, not the vein!

Jason Castro talks about hating to do interviews but oddly enough I liked hearing him talk about how much he hated being interviewed. Once again he performed with his guitar which added a great element to Idol that has never been introduced before. Woah! This is guy is an amazing singer. It was too bad the judges didn’t like it.

Luke Menard sang a Queen song, which mind as well of been a show boat performance. At least he’s nice to look at. I felt like I was watching an episode of “The Wiggles” without the dancing around. Pretty boring!

Ahhhhh Robbie Carrico the fake rock singing, drag racing, Justin Timberlake look-a-like hunk. This performance did get me “Hot Blooded” either way. I think at this point he probably wants to kill the next person who questions his authenticicy of being “rock” but even if he wanted to sing rock music, he will need a better song selection. I would like to hear him sing a song where he just belts it out and rocks it out like there is no tomorrow.

Then there’s Spongebob Gaypants Danny Noreiga. He sang The Carpenters. I love this guy, what a personality. They really should ban this song from American Idol though because everyone sings this song every season. I wanted to choke myself unconscious just for the fact that I was hearing this song again, the only thing that brought me out of my un-consciousness was Danny’s princess voice and the consistent giggling after Simon told him how much he liked him. OMG! OMG! What a cute couple they would make!

David Hernandez has great stage presence. He was giving looks to the crowd and knew just what face to make for the camera. Besides a little crack of the voice at the end that no one ever really noticed, this is my favorite performance so far.

Jason Yeager just upped his sexiness factor now that I know he plays instruments. He performed a Doobie Brother’s song and it was just OK for me. He still smiles that cheesy smile every time he performs and it kind of freaks me out but it was just OK. I thought the judges were a little too harsh on him and you could tell by the look on his face he was really hurt, which in it’s own wanted me to vote for him because I felt bad.

Chickezie finally explains the meaning and pronunciation of his name in the pre-interview performance. Chick-uzie gave a much better performance this week than last week. Very exciting! Very good voice! Very fun performance! I liked the very cleaver with the word play in the song and his personality came out in this performance.

My favorite contestant David Cook rocked the house. He got the crowd involved and moving all whilst singing and playing guitar. Bow chicka bow wow! I bet Robbie Carrico got pissed when Randy told David that he was the “real” rocker of the group. Besides the fact that it looked like he wanted to beat Simon over the head after telling him he had no charisma, which he should have after that remark, which would have been great to see. I loved it!

David Archuleta, how amazingly cute and sweet is this guy?  I hope they make this guy into a keychain so I can carry him with me. He shouldn’t be on this show, someone give this guy a record deal already. He is a freaking star!

Jorge’s Pick of the Night

• Contestant I Would Vote For: David Archuleta
• Sexiest Performance: David Hernandez
• Most Enjoyable Performance: David Cook

 Worst Performance: Luke Menard