Nachos, Tacos and Burritos...

A foreigner walks into a bar he's carrying a bag of cow manure, a shotgun, and a dead cat. He sits down at the bar an orders a drink, drinks the drink, loads the shotgun, shoots the bag, and takes a bite of the dead cat. He does this about 4 or 5 more times until the bartender finnally asks, "Wat the hell are you doing?" the foreigner says "I want to be like you Americans, I want to shoot the sh*t and eat pussy!"

What The Jorge? Rss

Pampering Your Pets for Christmas

Posted by Jorge | Posted in General, Linked, Pets | Posted on 22-12-2008

I’m not personally one to pamper my dogs and get them things for Christmas, because face it, they don’t know it’s Christmas! If you got them treats and toys any day of the week, they will be happy either way. However, if you have ridiculously overly-sensitive pets like I know my medium sized mutt is, I am going to look like I have nothing better to do for Christmas but to spend time wrapping a pet supplies for my pampered pooch.

For instance, a dog gift basket. It sounds ridiculous, I know but some people get this stuff for their dogs for Christmas:

Mystery Doggy Bag, Medium/Large Dog (DCHD2)

All Mystery Bags are made of assorted premium toys and treats. Regular Jeffers Price $46.47, Thanksgiving Price $24.95. While Supplies Last. Only 150 Available.

Your Price : $24.95

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The Little Horse That Could

Posted by Jorge | Posted in General, News, Pets | Posted on 24-11-2008

For such a small horse, it sure it making big news!

Meet the smallest horse to be born in Bliss at Riverdance Stud Farm in Victoria, South Australia.

The currently unnamed horse is a whopping 15 inches, equivalent to the size of ‘a week-old lamb.’ Miniature horses of her breed are normally born between 20-23 inches but this “little horse that could” is expected to grow 24 inches.

The town is currently holding a contest to give the horse a name before Christmas. No english saddles for this little girl.

Photo by Newspix / Rex Features, News information from Daily Mail UK

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The Manatee Mystery

Posted by Jorge | Posted in Audio & Video, General, Linked, News, Pets | Posted on 20-11-2008

Last week in Southeastern North Carolina in the Outer Banks, a manatee that reportedly was found dead.

The dead manatee reportedly was seen in the Alligator River over the weekend, even though the animal’s body has not yet been found. Statistically, a manatee can’t survive very long in water colder than 68 degrees. Recent water temperatures in North Carolina have been around 55 degrees.

In recent years, manatee’s have been visiting North Carolina frequently with sightings mostly in Southeastern North Carolina. The same situation has been occurring in Florida.

If you spot a manatee, it is recommended to watch it from a safe distance and not to feed it.

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Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon Hire A Dog Therapist

Posted by Jorge | Posted in Celebrity, General, Pets | Posted on 24-09-2008

The “Dog Whisperer” must have been busy because couple Jake Gyllenhaal and Reese Witherspoon have been reported to have hired a dog therapist.

Yes, I said dog therapist.

Why? Because their dogs are acting jealous towards each other and fighting.

Do they make doggie psychotherapy pills? I’d honestly hate to see what would happen if those poor dogs got acne pimples. Major reconstructive surgery?

That’s OK, I still love this couple. If Jake and Reese truly love each other, then their dogs eventually will.

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Paris Hilton’s Doggie Massacre

Posted by Jorge | Posted in Celebrity, General, Pets | Posted on 21-09-2008

Word has it that celebrity socialite, Paris Hilton lost two of her million dogs to a coyote that came down onto her property and attacked them.

OH NO NOT THE TACO BELL DOG?

Paris’ rep denies the story saying, “They were at Paris’ house Wednesday in her recording studio, and all the dogs were playing and looked as healthy and happy as can be,” a rep for Hilton, 27, told People magazine. “Paris even had a doggie mansion built for them and it is very secured. “

I wouldn’t doubt that her 17 dogs live a better life than most normal human beings. On top of the dogs it is reported she she supposedly also owns a goat, cats, two ferrets, a chinchilla and other exotic pets that might not even be legal in California. Not to mention, if you have more than three dogs don’t you have to have a kennel liscense?

This story gave flared up my allergies just reading it.

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The Base Jumping Dog

Posted by Jorge | Posted in Funny, General, Pets | Posted on 08-09-2008

PETA will be all over these girls like white on rice after watching this video:

My dog didn’t come near me for three days after I pushed him into a pond at the dog park, I cannot even imagine what this poor pooch is thinking!

The Base Jumping Dog

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Cozy Couches for Pampered Pooches

Posted by Jorge | Posted in Linked, Pets | Posted on 12-08-2008

As if some of us couldn’t afford regular furniture for our house and we sit on bean bags to watch TV at home (hey, bills happen!) But if you have the money to blow and decide that donating your money to charity is a waste then you can get this for your pampered pooch:

Dog Loungers???

To appeal to all of the environmentalists…the loungers are made with eco friendly bamboo.

What’s next? Matching dog hammocks or even outdoor furniture covers so they can lounge on the porch next to you.

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A Load Of Bull

Posted by Jorge | Posted in Funny, General, Pets | Posted on 01-08-2008

My wife and I went to the state fair and one of the first exhibits we stopped at was the breeding bulls. We went up to the first pen and there was a sign attached that said:

“This bull mated 50 times last year”

My wife playfully nudged me in the ribs…..Smiled and said, “He mated 50 times last year.”

We walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,

”This Bull Mated 150 Times Last Year”

My wife gave me a healthy jab and said, “WOW - That’s more than twice a week! ……..You could learn a lot from him.”

We walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in capital letters,

“THIS BULL MATED 365 TIMES LAST YEAR”

My wife was so excited that her elbow nearly broke my ribs, and said, “That’s once a day…You could REALLY learn something from this one.”

I looked at her and said, “Go over and ask him if it was with the same old cow”

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